I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
