My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Randomize
