we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
