i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
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