dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Randomize
