Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Help. Why am I so naked?
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