if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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