Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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