My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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