question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
