dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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