oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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