Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
