Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
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