I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Randomize
