No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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