What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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