If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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