I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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