____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
she looked like the before picture.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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