But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
