i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
