sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
if only i could text you this smell
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
