Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
