NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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