my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
