don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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