weddingsv make me drug and hornr
id be glad to
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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