I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
These tits shall not be calmed
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
