You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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