Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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