I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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