Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
