Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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