Nicole vs. Life
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
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