a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Randomize
