remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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