hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
