lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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