Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
