Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
