i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize
