when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
