office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize
