Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
