Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
You can't just leave with hair like that
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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