we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
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