I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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