i always forget guys have bellybuttons
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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