I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize
